Post 10: Can you define a Mother?

What is the definition of a mother? Someone who gives birth, carries a child for another (surrogacy), adopts a child; always nurtures her young one and cares for him/ her, at times becoming the strict teacher but always has nothing but love in her heart. There is not a word that can suffice what being a mother is? She must wear several hats at each point, that of a caretaker, a nurse at times, a babysitter, a chef, a school bus driver and so many more. And she must do this in addition to being her own individual self, while maintaining other simultaneous relationships of a wife, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law and so much more.

According to the dictionary a mother as a noun form is “a woman in relation to the child or children” which is not the right definition if you ask me. The verb form is even absurd “bring up (a child) with care and affection and or give birth to.” In context to this if you search for father the noun you get a search result as “a man in relation to his child or children” but the verb is horrendous “cause a pregnancy resulting in the birth of (a child)”. So, the primary responsibility of a man is to cause a pregnancy and that of a woman is to bring up the child with affection?

Not at all. This narrative needs to change with us, the women of today raising the boys and girls of tomorrow. Do not be afraid to question anything and everything that does not suit well with you. Take forwards only what you deem to be truly and wholly that which is and will be beneficial to you and the future generations. We need to achieve this by involving our partners the kids that we are raising for tomorrow to see equity amongst everything else. Equality is by giving everyone an equal opportunity but that one may not be useful if it is not catered to their specific criteria. That’s where equity comes in – being fair and impartial.

The generation before us was used to subduing women, suppressing them, and keeping them glued to the kitchen and caretaking. This is not to say that if that is a choice even today it should be. But I know many ambitious women who wear multiple hats, break norms, and sometimes do things of such value yet no one ever notices them. To them I salute and to them I want to reach out and say keep doing you, the fruits of the labor will harbor in its own time.

Of course every generation has women supporters that have strived to open avenues for women and it has taken a long time to reach here. Therefore, we must not forget that and only take it forwards.

And I know we live in a very modern world today but what is reflected in the one definition mentioned above is what is still defining societies. This narrative must change with us as women of today raising the young ones of tomorrow, it could be in the form of children our own, children in a school we teach, grandkids we babysit, children in daycare and everyone involved. A mother is someone who no doubt will love you the most because you grew inside her even if not her womb, in her mind in her heart. But a father is also equally responsible. I am very glad I have a supportive husband, but I expected none the less because I have a father who is very supportive of women at least in my eyes. I also have people who believe that women’s place needs to be shown to them in terms of manipulation and gaslighting and to that I want you as readers to understand that being today’s women you do not need to entertain it. Let them be entertained with whoever wants to entertain them. It should be your onus to accept nothing but the best for your self now and the future so that you can give  your best now and in the future.