Post 13: Why is it so Difficult Being A woman?

 

Hi There! Let me Explain. The Day I am sitting down to write this is a Saturday Night. I have made an active promise to myself to get this Blog working for me and my family and also help the women and men who come to this blog with the purpose of hoping to read a perspective of a working woman winging it with everyday life. However, I did not get a chance to get it done this week, so this update is going to be in promoted next week.

Moving On Today was one of those days wherein I was able to achieve a lot and yet not able to get a lot done. So here is my thought, see as a Indian Woman, what I have witnessed is Indian Parents, at least my Indian parents after a certain age get seriously worried about their daughters having to be married at a specific time otherwise they will be labelled as spinsters their whole life. And not to go off topic, but I do think that the decision my parents took to get me married has worked in my favor in terms of me receiving my two angel kids as blessings, a husband who is I would call supportive knowing that he comes from a background wherein the man doesn’t even lift his own plates of food.

But that is where my dilemma comes in. Its difficult being a woman especially me. I was a protected woman all my life or I thought so, you can say sheltered but they way I was married and the trials I have faced after marriage are hard to explain in a blog post.

So coming back to Saturday, my Husband and I both Work, I am also trying to build my online business along side and while my kids need me they don’t need me so much so I am able to find a lot of time during the weekdays to work on my side hustle. But come weekends I go back to being the mother, the wife who has to cook four to five meals a day, feed the two kids, clean up the apartment to get ready for the upcoming week, and also work on my side hustle and work.

It gets to my head at times. Maybe I would want to focus more on my Business on the weekends or maybe I just need some sort of help. Not a lot but a little bit. My husband takes care of my kids when I am at work, and he is wonderful when he drops of the kids in the morning but that’s the thing that I know I have maybe taken on too much and it is pushing me but That’s also the thought that I do not want to give up on what I truly believe in.

My beliefs in respect to my Business changes every day as I adapt to new information, and nothing is above my kids and my family, but I do feel its difficult being a woman in my space.

A woman who is expected to take care of everyone, but no one wants to take care of her. I am not talking about my immediate family but about the in-laws. That relationship I still don’t understand, and I still am not able to get over but that is also my dilemma.

A woman of my character if she speaks and she was valued she would have had so much confidence earlier on. But in my case, I have always faced opposition for speaking up for doing what I believe in simply because the place that I got married in has a regressive attitude towards women, or so I feel. And trust me when I say I am going to fight this till eternity if I can but sometimes the thought comes in that If the family had been supportive, I would have had people who would have helped me raise my kids, who would have tried to understand where I am coming from and maybe I wouldn’t have felt so overwhelmed.

It's difficult getting married into a Indian Household and that’s why I also have this dilemma that when my kids get married am I going to be like what my in-laws are right now or am I going to be different.

I know rather than make you feel any ease I might have confused you all the more but that is what I have felt all along.
I keep going because:

1) I believe in myself, and my vision will become clearer as days go by

2) I don’t want my kids or their partners to experience so much reluctance

3) I have always been a woman who has irked someone or the other because of my thoughts, my words and my vision and it's not that I try to be a prick, but I have always felt that I am made for bigger things.

4) I want my kids to see a version of myself that I am proud of so that they can look up to that version and aim to be bigger than that.

 

And for you as my Readers All I want to know is Yes, it is So difficult being a Woman, A woman who has opinions, a woman who can command attention, a woman that irks people because she doesn’t let them get away with bullsh*t. But no matter what it is woman like us who change the next generation so that no one ever has to face the trials that we have faced.

Regards

-V